Posted by: kidnothing | November 16, 2016

Review: Gardein Fishless Filets and Crabless Cakes



just so you know, yes. yes i am posting this 10 minutes after my last post. but this is really important, so hold onto ya butts.

so i’ve actually had these in my freezer for about two months, because i’ve been terrified. these were my first foray into nonmeat fish options, and i’ve seen some scary looking stuff out there. it was actually my boyfriend who finally convinced me to make a vegan fish fry and try them both at once, bite the bullet and get it over with and so on and so forth.

so i did. i got some extra crispy crinkle-cut fries, popped the filets and the fries in the oven and my boyfriend cooked the cakes. (he also burned them but that’s neither here nor there.) and we served them with some Whataburger-brand spicy ketchup(listen man, i’m a native Texan. Spicy ketchup is a way of life here).

they were INCREDIBLE.

i grew up eating fresh-caught fish, fried expertly by my fisherman dad, and chowing down with some ketchup and tartar sauce. this is VERY close to that experience. the fishless filets are a little dryer and more chewy than flaky, but the taste is dead-on and the texture is very close. the breading was flaky and delicious and had an amazing crunch. the crabless cakes are really good too. however, bell peppers are the fucking devil, and if i had any real criticism with Gardein products(THEY’RE BAE SORRY NOT SORRY), it’s that they put bell peppers in fucking EVERYTHING, and i am NOT about that life. luckily, the pepper flavor was very mild in the crab cakes, and the taste and texture were more or less exactly like real crab cakes i’ve had in the past. once again, the breading was great, even mildly burnt.

also, everything passed the omnivore boyfriend test. his motto is “i don’t care if it’s not real meat; if it’s good, i’ll eat it.” he REALLY liked the crabless cakes and urged me to buy more.

i will definitely be buying both again. i’m thinking fishless baja tacos next time! HELL YEAH

keep it vegan,


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